Policework

A local policeman had just finished his shift one cold November evening and was at home with his wife. "You just won't believe what happened this evening, in all my years in the force I've never seen anything like it."
"Oh, yes dear, what happened?"
"I came across two guys down by the canal, one of them was drinking battery acid and the other was eating fireworks."
"What did you do with them?"
"Oh that was easy. I charged one and let the other off."

Turkey problems
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy replied, "No, ma'am, they are dead."

Real friendship
Two friends were standing in a bank when a pair of robbers entered. Not only did the thieves clean out the tills, but also they walked around ith bags and ordered everyone to throw their valuables in. Just as the robbers got to the pair, one of the friends turned to the other and, passing him a bill, said, "By the way, Joe, here's that twenty bucks I owe you."

Teacher: John, if there were 5 birds on the fence, and you shot one, how many are left?
John: None, Ma'am, coz the other four will fly away.
Teacher: Actually John the answer is four, but i like the way you are thinking.
John: Ma'am I also have a question.
Teacher: Go ahead.
John: In an ice cream shop, there were three ladies eating ice cream in a cone. The first lady was licking the ice cream, the other was biting the ice cream and the last one was sucking the cone. Who do you think is married?
Teacher: I guess the one Sucking the cone.
John: No Ma'am. The one with the wedding ring is Married, but i like the way you are thinking.

sah man palag?? ahahahah!

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